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What To Look For In A Man

There is a saying that goes, “You have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find your prince” and a lot of us have kissed so many frogs that we are reevaluating what we are looking for in a man.


After all of those slimy frogs, we really start to put a high value on honesty and finding a genuinely honest man is almost like hitting the jackpot. If he is the right combination of honesty and compassion, he won’t outright tell us we look fat in that dress, but he will let us know that it doesn’t exactly flatter our body type and then take us shopping for something better.

Solid Work Ethic

We have dated the lazy mama’s boys, the frat boys and the trust fund boys. When we settle down, we want a man who is honest and hard-working. Whether he makes a salary or minimum wage can vary, but the bottom line is that he puts in his hours and doesn’t slack off or waste our time. A little extra spending money never hurt either.

Respect The Gods

Okay so he doesn’t actually have to treat us a like a goddess, but respect is definitely a must. We want to know that no matter what, he will respect our opinions, our bodies and our personalities and not try to change us put us down or stomp all over us. This is why we want a man and not a boy.

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Personal Hygiene

No one wants to date a guy who shows up in ripped jeans and a dirty shirt with cheese dust on his fingers and three days of beard darkening his face. We want our ideal man to know how a toothbrush, razor and deodorant work and where to go when he has dirty clothes (hint: it is not his mom’s house). It’s okay if he uses three-in-one instead of regular shampoo, conditioner and soap like the rest of us.

Loyalty And Fidelity

Both these words pretty much mean the same thing. We want a guy who will stick by us no matter what and who won’t go wandering off to explore on his own and then lie about it later. Even if he doesn’t lie about it, we still don’t want him wandering off. We want a man who will stay loyal and stick with us.

Sense Of Humor

Having a sense of humor is vital to life nowadayseven a dark one counts. We want a guy who knows how to laugh and laughs easily, frequently and genuinely. It is especially nice when he is laughing with us instead of at us. We aren’t looking to be the butt of anyone’s jokes around here. Besides, if we like this guy and settle down, a sense of humor is vital to succeeding in the stressful phase of life known as parenting.


The best part about this word is that it has passion in it. We want a guy who is passionate about helping others, who understands the struggles of those he encounters on a daily bases and who will listen to our problems with a sense of understanding and empathy. We want to know that our hearts and emotions are safe with this guy before we invest in him too deeply and a compassionate man is perfect for this requirement.

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Street smarts and book smarts are all fine and dandy, but we ideally want someone with a blend of both and some honest to goodness common sense. Someone who reads the instructions on things before cooking or assembling, someone who reads the fine print or looks up maps when he is lost or asks for our opinion. And can hold an intelligent conversation too.


We all like a man who knows what he wants and is confident enough to go after it. We don’t need the overabundance of confidence that boys are born with that is just a death wish waiting to happen. Instead, we want the confidence that comes with age and maturity, from hard-won experience and the knowledge that it isn’t worth a trip to the ER just to impress us.

Supportive Nature

If we know that he has our back whether we fail or succeed, then we are capable of almost anything. Having the loving support and unconditional love of that one key figure in our life can be the difference between trying out and failing or not trying out and never knowing what could have been. His support can come in different forms as well from emotional to spiritual, physical and financial.

Good Communication Skills

One of the problems we had with all those frogs was the lack of clear, concise communication. Sure, they might have been communicating, but all we heard was confused croaking. So now we want someone who is in touch with his own emotions and thoughts enough to understand them and who has a large enough vocabulary with which to express those feelings to us and to understand when we express ours to him in return.

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Protective Instincts

This is different than fits of jealousy. We want to know that we are safe around this guy and that he will keep us that way. This instinct shows up in little ways like walking us to our car and then waiting to leave to make sure our car starts, and we can get home without any problems.


Okay so this one is a little bit shallow, but after all the other boxes have been ticked, we are allowed to factor in some looks. What appeals to one woman will look different compared to another woman’s ideals, but the bottom line is that we want someone who excites us and looks good in our eye. Let’s face it, we are shopping for keeps here and want to like what we end up buyingespecially if we are investing for the rest of our lives.

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